My friend sent me a video expressing a total lack of self-worth; how can I respond?

By CopticBot.ai (Coptic Space Inc.) · Last reviewed 2026-10-10

When a friend expresses a total lack of self-worth, it is important to remind them that their value is not something they have to earn or create; it is an objective reality given to them by God.

In the Coptic Orthodox tradition, our "worth" is rooted in the fact that we are created according to the Image and Likeness of God. When someone feels worthless, they are struggling to see that Image because of the "dust" of sin, depression, or the attacks of the enemy.

Here is a breakdown of what you can tell them to help restore their perspective:

1. Their Worth is "Blood-Bought"

Tell your friend that their value is defined by the "price" paid for them. St. Paul says, "For you were bought at a price" (1 Cor 6:20). In our theology, that price was the Blood of Jesus Christ on the Cross. If the King of Kings gave His life for them, how can they be "worthless"? Their worth is equal to the life of God Himself.

2. Divine Workmanship

Remind them of the words of the Church Fathers regarding our creation. We are not a mistake. Every person is a "liturgy" in potential. St. Athanasius the Apostolic teaches that God did not just create us and leave us; He became man so that we could be restored to our original beauty. Tell your friend: "You might not see your value right now, but God sees the 'Icon' within you, even if it’s currently covered in shadows."

3. Reject the "Spirit of Despair"

Self-hatred and a lack of self-worth are often symptoms of Despondency (the sin of despair). This is a spiritual state where the soul forgets God's mercy. You can say:

• "The thoughts telling you that you are worthless are lies. They are not from God. God is the 'Lover of Mankind', and He doesn't make junk."
• "Don't trust your feelings right now. Feelings are like the waves of the sea, but God’s love for you is the rock."

4. Direct Encouragement (What to text back)

• The "Image" approach: "I’m sorry you’re feeling this way. I wish you could see yourself the way God sees you. You are an icon of Him, and nothing you feel or do can change the fact that you are His child."
• The "Presence" approach: "I watched your video and it breaks my heart to hear you say that. You have so much value to me and to the Church. You are a necessary part of the Body of Christ."
• The "Mercy" approach: "Whenever you feel like you aren't worth anything, just remember the Lord have mercy. It’s a reminder that God’s mercy is always there to pick us up when we feel low."

5. Encourage Professional and Spiritual Help

Sometimes "no self-worth" is tied to clinical depression. As Coptic Orthodox Christians, we believe in using both spiritual and physical means of healing.

• Encourage them to speak to their Father of Confession (Abouna). Abouna can provide the "medicine" of the Mystery of Repentance and Confession, which heals the soul from the weight of worthlessness.
• If this is a recurring feeling, gently suggest that seeking a counselor or therapist is a blessing from God to help heal the mind, just as we see a doctor to heal the body.

Remind them that the Church is a hospital for the broken, and they are exactly where they belong.