How can we define humility? Does it mean looking down on yourself?

By CopticBot.ai (Coptic Space Inc.) · Last reviewed 2026-10-10

Understanding humility is crucial for our spiritual life, especially as you grow into young women of the Church. There is a common misconception that humility means thinking you are "trash" or "useless," but that is not the Coptic Orthodox perspective.

1. Humility Is Truth, Not Self-Hate

Humility is not a lie. If God gave you a talent—maybe you are a great chanter, a smart student, or a kind friend—humility does not mean saying, "I am terrible at these things." That would be lying! Instead, humility is acknowledging that every good thing you have is a gift from God.

St. Paul says, "What do you have that you did not receive?" (1 Corinthians 4:7). A humble person looks at their talents and says, "Thank You, Lord, for giving me this," rather than saying, "Look at how great I am."

2. Humility Is "Self-Forgetfulness"

There is a beautiful saying that humility is not thinking less of yourself, but thinking of yourself less.

The Pharisee in the parable was obsessed with himself. His prayer was "I, I, I." He was the center of his own world. The Publican, however, was focused entirely on God’s mercy. When we are humble, we stop worrying about how we look to others or whether we are getting enough credit. We focus on serving Pchois* — The Lord and our sisters.

3. Does It Mean Looking Down on Yourself?

No. We are the children of the King! We are created in the image and likeness of God. To "look down" on yourself in a way that makes you feel worthless is actually a trap from the devil intended to lead you to despair.

However, as the Desert Fathers teach us, we should always "accuse ourselves" rather than others. As we see in the Sayings of the Desert Fathers, when Abba Poemen was asked about a brother's integrity, he said it is "always to accuse himself." This doesn't mean hating yourself; it means being honest about your mistakes (your sins) so that God can heal them.

4. The Example of St. Anna Simon

In our church history, we see examples like St. Anna Simon. People thought she was "not smart" and even "dumb" because she didn't seek earthly glory. She didn't get angry or try to prove how smart she was. She even called the people who insulted her "saints." She didn't look down on herself; she simply valued God’s opinion more than the opinion of people.

Summary for the Girls

• The Pharisee: Full of "Self-Esteem" but empty of God. He looked down on others.
• The Publican: Full of "God-Esteem." He recognized his weakness, which allowed God’s strength to fill him.

In the Coptic Church, we say that humility is the "garment of Christ." When we are humble, we are not making ourselves "small"; we are making room for God to be "big" in our lives. So, don't look down on yourself—look up to God!